Posts

Fear Vs. Courage

Image
Fear Vs Course  When you were little where you afraid of what was under your bed? I was! I remember I would turn off the light and jump into my bed so afraid something would grab my ankles in the dark. Now where I got this fear I have no idea but for some reason as a child I just knew there was some big scary thing that could get me but at long as I stayed in my bed I was safe. For some reason my bed was impenetrable. I don't remember when I stopped being afraid of the dark or things under my bed. Its funny cause if I had just looked under my bed to confirm there was nothing there maybe it would have helped or maybe just the idea of something could one day get under my bed. This is why my mother never let me watch scary movies I have plenty of imagination to scare myself. Courage is very often tough to come by because fear is so powerful. Can you think of a time you passed up some amazing opportunity because of fear and later you thought how could I have been so silly to be afraid

Rising from the Ashes "No matter what I say, what I believe I am bankrupt without love"

  Are you living or just existing? Are you living an abundant life and if not what do you need to change to live that life? I heard someone once say the grass is greenest where you are watering it and that resonated with me. It doesn't matter where you are, you might think if I just move to a better house, better community, better state, better job, it will be better. But I can attest to you that's not true cause I tried that. The best place I have ever been is the place  I  made the best. Often people will view you in their lens on how they like you, but don't let those people tie you to their lens of how they want to see you because they want you to stay there. That's a mistake! Don't stay stuck where people put you. I learned that lesson long ago. I stopped letting people tell me where my place was and started making my own place in life and where I wanted to be. Some people have faith but no power. You want both! I have found the right way is never the easy way.

Tired Weary Soul

Tired and Weary Soul The other night as I sat down in bed after a long exhausting day and I had a this odd feeling I actually felt like my soul was tired, it was weary. It was a strange feeling, different from my typical exhaustion. I thought to myself well it's been a tough, long emotional year. Maybe my soul is just feeling it. I mean we live in a world where I and many of us grow weary of watching the news, hearing all the hate, anger and violence. I grow tired of others' selfishness, and dealing with the negativity of this world. My heart breaks for the brokenness of our world. And this world seeks to wear us down and make us weary.  The following day after feeling my weary soul I met with three of my closest girlfriends who where all in pain and hurt from something going on in their lives and as I poured my soul and heart into them, I found myself renewed because I was doing something good and right for my friends. I find empowerment in this verse "And let us not grow

Why is self care so hard for women?

Image
  Why is self care so hard for women? Alright men don't go running when you see this title because as important as it is for women to know how to have self care, you as boyfriends, husbands, brothers, fathers, grandfathers need to know how to support the women in your lives. I am just as guilty as other women when it comes to self care. I was first alerted of this when I stepped into the biggest job of my life. In that moment of my life I accepted a job while on maternity leave to take over being an Associate Dean of over 20 business colleges. No problem! I thought sure, I had a 2 year old and newborn, but it was remote so yeah, of course I can do this. Things started off with a downward spiral, not because of me, but because of the boss. No matter what I did, I was told daily I was worthless and I'd be fired soon. When I did my eight week checkup before I started this job I was super healthy recovering form a C-section. I went in 6 months later for a checkup and my doctor was

Suriving Motherhood and being a working mom

Image
Summer is here and for all working moms, life just got more complicated, especially if you don't have thousands of dollars to poor into camps, and clubs, and more. But as working moms, we have to find that balance of working and spending time with our kids. After working with thousands of people and especially women over the last 20 years I have found some great tips to share that I found success using them: Don't get stuck consumed in work I have found the happiest and most successful working moms balance life in many areas, not just kids and work they integrate in time with friends, community events. hobbies and even have time to consider their health. If all you do is work, work, work and then do kid time you will burn out quickly. You need time for yourself, your friends, and so much more. Find the balance! Ask yourself, will anything change if I finish this tonight or tomorrow morning? Usually, the answer is no, but often we women are so consumed with being the best that w

How to Negotiate Like a Woman not a Man

Image
Confessions of a Working Mom Negotiation and conflict when I was younger always give me a stomach ache. As soon as someone would say I need to talk to you. I would sit there, go over and over in my mind...what did I do, what did I do wrong, then I would get called in to be told that I got the employee of the month award. And I would always think to myself why do I always go to the negative.? Why can't I see my worth? I would never think maybe they want to talk to me about the great job I am doing. The "what did I do wrong" mindset had to change. I started to look at myself and think, I am going to make myself a commodity they can't afford to lose. I started to look at myself as an expert and carry myself in that way. I walked into rooms like I owned them and once I changed that mindset; that I was worthy to sit at the table and experienced enough to not just sit at the table but run the table. You have to have this mentality if you are going to be able to negotiate an

Is your significant other your glass ceiling?

Image
  Is your significant other your glass ceiling? Over the last 8 months, I have had countless conversations with close girlfriends, and even women I hardly know about how the pandemic is affecting them. In fact, many of these women have had to quit their jobs, take leave, or scale back on their work to homeschool their children. Due to my husband's job, I homeschooled the kids from March to June. I moved my work schedule to 8pm at night till 1 or 2 in the morning as the homeschool took up most of the day and then I had to take the kids to get some outside time and still do all the other household chores. My husband has done everything in his power to lessen the burden but I did have more flexibility in my schedule to do this so that is why it was me. Had it been the opposite he would have done the same thing. But several women I talked to who are married to wonderful men who love them, are not willing to jump in and give their wives the support they need for their workload. Many hus